9/11

I can't help but be shocked and saddened by the incredible news in New York City:

Reuters

In one of the most audacious attacks ever against the United States, terrorists crashed two
airliners into the World Trade Center in a deadly series of blows Tuesday that brought down the
twin 110-story towers.

As a boy growing up across the river in Jersey City, I watched the World Trade Center rise up in the very early 70s (it was completed in 1973, when I was five). As a young man, I visited it numerous times. When I dated my wife, I took her to the observation deck. Now, it is simply not there anymore.

Lost Cell Phone

Last Friday, I had somehow misplaced my cell phone. I noticed this around 10AM at work. I quickly went to my car to look for it: not there.

At first, I felt mild frustration. Could I have been so flaky? I carry the thing in my pocket 80% of the time. I felt a little 'unprepared' without it. How would Jenn be able to reach me? On the way home from work that Friday, I called in our usual pizza order at a pay phone.

I harbored a sobering thought: I'm slowly becoming an addled old man.

Jenn snapped me out of it. Take action! Think and traceback your steps! I applied my brain to the missing phone. When and where did I have it last? (Thursday night, I brought it in the house.) Can I 'call the phone'? (No, I remember I turned it off as soon as I got in the house.)

I actually started getting into the frame of mind of purchasing a new phone, and for a moment, this kept me from sinking too deeply into despair. People lose cell phones; I'm not the first one to do so, and I won't be the last one to do so.

My parents were up during this weekend, and my mother said "You can't find it if you're looking too hard for it. You'll find it only when you aren't looking for it." Thanks, Mom.

Despite her wisdom, I kept up my search. How could I have lost it? I don't remember actually loosing it. I simply laid it down somewhere; it must have gotten pushed aside. I upended a bag full of newspapers to be recycled (I recall the phone sitting near my pile of newspapers). I scanned my shelves (I might just put it down somewhere close).

Sunday arrived. Jenn suggested take out. Once again, I stepped outside without a phone. I almost asked for Jenn's cell phone (which she's never lost). This time, I had a fleeting thought: I walked out of the house with my phone Friday morning. It must be in my car! And yes, even though I searched under the seats, this time I got down on my knees, and squinted.

And yes, it was indeed, under the passenger seat, tucked between the rail for adjusting the seat, and some electronics. With a flourish, I showed it to Jenn, who lovingly rolled her eyes.

I put the phone in my pocket.

Rising Jobless Rate

OK.

The U.S. Department of Labor issued a report that the unemployment rate hit 4.9%. According to the Associated Press, "The increase in the monthly jobless rate was the biggest in six years."

And on that mailing list populated by ex-employees of my last job, someone announced that his job was just eliminated.

Bleh.

Feelers

Coincidence?

I received an e-mail from a mailing list populated by ex-employees of my last job. IBM is hiring technical sales engineers. After I muttered "Where were you four months ago?", I then read a headline on Yahoo! stating Jobs Picture Weak, but Worst May Be Over.

Indeed.

Mia and I

A few days ago, Jenn captured a fun photo of Mia and I. Even though it's out of focus, Mia's happy face is very clear, and it's one of my favorite photos of me and my daughter.

Laying Off People

Today, Hewlett-Packard announced it was buying Compaq. Up to 15000 overlapping jobs will be eliminated. I suppose we're all used to these kind of numbers by now.

How will these 15000 jobs be eliminated? Who will these people be? I'm sure managers and employees at HP and Compaq are fretting over these very questions. In the Boston area, there is a sizeable Compaq community, because a few years ago, Compaq bought Digital Equipment Corporation (DEC).

When we had to lay off people at my last job, I was a manager involved with the actual tasks of deciding who should be let go. I didn't have to face these huge numbers. I only had to "let go" two people. However, that fateful day last October was one of the most draining days of my career.

I still remember the "training" we middle-managers had to attend on how to perform the "task". I still have the crib sheet I used when I talked to the two people I was letting go.

Today's merger and pending layoff news brings me back to that ugly day, although for the 15000 overlapping employees, their day of reckoning won't be for some time. But it'll get here, and we'll just take the news in stride.

It's Fall

September is here, and it was cold last night, and this morning. I wore sweatpants, and a fleece pullover. It must have been in the 50s, it felt that cold.

September: Football. Obligatory articles about Boston college students moving back to town. Hockey camp. Shorter days. Colder days. The anticipation of Halloween, Thanksgiving, then Christmas. The "last quarter" of the year. Months that end with "ber".

Already the hot days are a dim memory. Already my car's heater kicks on automatically. Already we're thinking of turning up the heat a little.

There's something about turning the calendar from August to September that makes the past year's event seem much more distant (baby, lay-off, new job). The First Day of Autumn isn't until September 22, but mentally, it's Fall to me.

Finishing Books

The last book I finished was in June. Since then, I've been on and off with The Executioner's Song. (This tome is a little over a thousand pages, and is itself split over two books, each with seven parts. I'm in Part Two of the Book Two.)

Caller ID

I hate hearing the phone ring. We have caller ID, so lately we've begun to not answer the phone. After a few unanswered calls, we'll check the caller ID list or the machine. Our family seems to know that this is our new practice.

At my last job, the phone ringing could mean work intruding into an evening. Usually a telemarketer or fund-raiser will catch us when we're eating. Often I'm watching a movie, or reading. Or on the computer.

What's amazing to me is that the phone never rings with anyone I want to speak to. When I was growing up, I picked up the phone the moment it rang. I could count on the phone ringing with a friend. Today, it's a rarity. When it's after 8PM, I typically turn the phone ringer off.

There are days when I complain to Jenn that we shouldn't have a phone. People can communicate to me via e-mail. Or they should write me letters (although I do not write as frequently).

Today, I had to call an old friend though. I couldn't make his daughter's first birthday party. I wanted to say well wishes for her. I wanted to hear my old friend's voice, and swap a few stories. I remember feeling hopeful as the phone rang, but instead I got the answering machine.

I told him to send me e-mail.

Trainspotting

Just finished watching Trainspotting, and was completely blown away. Even though I knew a little bit about the story, I wasn't prepared for all the horrific images. A stunning story, with lots of dark corners.

(This is also the first movie I've watched from start to finish in one evening. That's a rarity these days!)

Not Winning

No, we didn't win the lottery. :-)

The Lottery

The jackpot at the nearby Powerball Lottery is at a breathtaking $280 million. I live in Massachusetts, which doesn't participate in Powerball, but bordering Connecticut, Rhode Island and New Hampshire sell tickets. So Jenn's father got us tickets from Connecticut.

Fantasizing about winning the lottery is a delicious game.

Today, if $280 million were dropped into my lap, I'd pay off the car and the house, get a nanny, and move us to another neighborhood. I'd work part-time. I'd get into digital video and editing. I'd be buying a bigger TV, a bigger car, a bigger computer (maybe even two) and custom-fitted golf clubs. I'd increase my annual giving (always to my high school and college almae mater). I'd get my basement finished (oh wait, the bigger house will have a finished basement). My parents and brothers and close family would share this wealth. Needless to say, Jenn and Mia's future would be vastly different too.

While fantasizing about this is fun, there is always the letdown when I realize $280 million won't fall into my lap. I need to get past the letdown (and not blow $100 on scratch tickets and the lottery), and get back to patience, savings, 401(K), IRA, being careful with the money I do earn, keeping myself 'employable' in a field that I find 'enjoyable'. These are my slow tickets to wealth. And it's a more sure bet that if everything goes well, Mia, Jenn, and I will be able to enjoy some of these things over time.

(But if it were to happen, rest assured that I'll probably be into a new Audi A6. OK, I'll stop fantasizing now!)

Local Demolition

In my town, they're demolishing a nearby elementary school. I get a view of their progress every morning on my way to work. It's amazing what a "new view" does to a landscape. The houses behind the school are well exposed to my view now. The construction has uprooted some of the trees, so the street seems more "open". I like it, even though I look forward to the new school they're planning to build.

Wash Your Car

When you're feeling blue, go wash your car.

I've been reading Dave's Scripting News for a few months now. He's helping me keep up to date regarding open source, and other technology news. Quite often he'll insert a note or two about his personal life, and his August 18th column ("wash your car") was something I felt like sharing.

Jimy Williams

The Boston Globe ran a a list of funny quotes from Jimy Williams, the former manager of the Boston Red Sox, who was let go last week. Every quote was funny, and most had me bursting out laughing. My two favorites (I hope the link above is still accessible):

On where his hometown of Arroyo Grande, Calif., was located:

"It's about 3 miles past `Resume Speed."'

On what he would be thinking about while driving home after the team finished last season against Tampa Bay:

"Stay in my lane."

Running Linux

I'm posting this from a Netscape browser, running on Linux. Yes, that's right. My computer is now running Linux.

I spent the better part of the past three evenings repartitioning my hard drive, and then installing Red Hat Linux (7.1). The home computer now boots up in either Windows 98 or Linux.

As a UNIX fan, Linux has much to offer me. Certainly it's the ideal environment for recreational programming. And I enjoy configuring and tinkering with Linux's cool features. But I'm not ready to drop Windows 98 for Linux. At least not yet.

Ultra-Pasteurization

Do you know what I consider a modern miracle these days? Ultra-pasteurization.

I drink milk infrequently. But when I do, I'm always amazed that the Hood Simply Smart 1% Milk in our refrigerator is never out of date. The one in our fridge now has a spoil date of August 19, but I know it's been in our fridge since early last month. Hood introduced this milk, as near as I can tell, in 1999. Jenn must have went to a meeting (as Denis Leary might say), because we've been drinking this stuff for probably a year.

Got milk? Yes. Fresh up to two months!

Mistaken Deposit

Today I got a note from my bank saying that I had entered $20,000 for a check I deposited into an ATM machine. The check was actually for $2000.

This is why I like making deposits with real tellers: I'm sure that would have been caught immediately.

Customer Service

A few days ago, when Jenn took Mia to the doctor's, the health insurance card (HMO Blue New England (Blue Cross/Blue Shield)) didn't work.

Today, I called Blue Cross to figure out the deal: it turns out that I was still covered under the health coverage of my previous employer! I was covered twice, which causes all sorts of problems when making claims.

The Blue Cross customer service representative walked me through this mess, and even made an on-the-spot decision to take care of one overdue payment to the physical therapist ($500!). I then called my old job, and raised this issue with someone in human resources. I was listed as a terminated employee, but I was still receiving health insurance benefits from them! The person I spoke with took care of this (she sent to Blue Cross a Change of Enrollment form via the employer's section on the Blue Cross web page).

I was all prepared for the bureaucracy to fail me here, but the two people who spoke with me today were courteous and very cooperative. It sure made me feel good to have all of this resolved.

Job Security

At my company's fiscal year meeting (a company-wide affair that took place at the Sheraton in Nashua, NH), someone received a recognition award for being with the company 15 years. Amazing.

I admit that in my life now, I would love to look back on fifteen years at one company. 15 years from now, I'll be 48, closing in on my retirement. Mia will be 15 years old. And if a company could give me that kind of employment security, I'd take it.

Sadly, right now, I think I would be honestly surprised if I wake up on my 48th birthday, and still employed with Mercury. Instead, I'm working to stay employed from quarter to quarter, not because of any rumblings within the company, but simply because I have been "let go" once already. I'd like not to experience that again.